Writing for women - and talking to them during radio phone-ins and at events - it's often tempting to dismiss their pestering partners as sexually voracious testosterone-driven factories.
Letters to problem pages tend to be brief, often focusing on practical - even technical - sexual issues.After 12 years of writing about sex, I felt pretty confident that nothing could surprise me. I've been agony aunt for Company Magazine for many years.I'm one of Scarlet Magazine's 'Pleasure Aunts' (not as questionable as it sounds) and have written countless features and five books on the ins and outs of making love.And far from the cosy, all-girls-together whingeing I anticipated-Ooh, men! '), the book charts the deepest, private emotions of both genders - and reveals a hidden world that's truthful, painful and sometimes inspiring.The diaries aren't really about sex at all, but about the emotions that surround sex with someone you love - fear, intimacy, gratitude, guilt, resentment, loneliness, hope.
Several women also express a sadness that their levels of sexual desire are so ill-matched with their partners.'Bombarded with sexualised adverts, suggestive TV and feisty articles (some, admittedly, written by me) suggesting that the key to great sex is simply a noholdsbarred approach and a satin thong, it's no wonder so many suffer in silence.